SAAS and BAHU Amazing Fight war of words tension
Doing by your way of wording, it seems you might have a difficult culture. However, I recommend you and your wife have your own home. That solve a lot of the tension.
As far as taken sides, your wife is your priority now when you married her. You “left the nest” when you came of age to get married. However, they are being in the wrong for putting you in the middle when you have a right to talk to your family.
You need to tell them this is between them and they need to be grown ups and solve it. Not involving others in it. You need to support your wife, but supporting doesn’t mean you taken her side. Just means you are willing to help if help is needed.
This seems like a situation your wife and t hey need to solve. I recommend everyone talking about it and isntead of saying “who did or said what”. Focus on more of “what will we do about it. What can be done about it now”.